Best of RAJNIKANTH JOKES


Rajnikanth can do anything!

1. Rajinikanth killed the Dead Sea.
2. When Rajinikanth does push-ups, he isn't lifting himself up. ...He is pushing the earth down.
3. There is no such thing as evolution, it's just a list of creatures that Rajinikanth allowed to live.
4. Rajinikanth gave Mona Lisa that smile.
5 .Rajnikanth can divide by zero.
6. Rajinikanth can judge a book by it's cover.
7. Rajinikanth can drown a fish.
8. Rajinikanth can delete the Recycle Bin.
9. Rajinikanth once got into a fight with a VCR player. Now it plays DVDs.
10. Rajinikanth can slam a revolving door.
11. Rajinikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes.
12. Rajinikanth once ordered a plate of idli in McDonald's, and got it.
13. Rajinikanth can win at Solitaire with only 18 cards.
14. The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajinikanth kicked one of the corners off.
15. Rajinikanth can build a snowman out of rain.
16. Rajinikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone.
17. Rajinikanth can make onions cry.
18. Rajinikanth destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
19. Rajinikanth can watch the show 60 minutes in 20 minutes.
20. 
Rajinikanth has counted to infinity, twice.
21. Rajinikanth will attain separate statehood in 2013.
22. Rajinikanth did in fact, build Rome in a day.
23. Rajinikanth once got into a knife-fight. The knife lost.
24. Rajinikanth can play the violin with a piano.
25. Rajinikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear.
26. The only man who ever outsmarted Rajinikanth was Stephen Hawking, and he got what he deserved.
27. Rajinikanth can talk about Fight Club.
28. Rajinikanth doesn't breathe. Air hides in his lungs for protection.
29. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. Rajinikanth lives in Chennai.
30. Rajinikanth kills Harry Potter in the eighth book.
31. Rajinikanth does not own a stove, oven, or microwave, because revenge is a dish best served cold.
32. Rajinikanth has already been to Mars, that's why there are no signs of life there.
33. Rajinikanth doesn't move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajinikanth.
34. Rajinikanth knows Victoria's secret.
35. Water boils faster when Rajinikanth stares at it.
36. Rajinikanth can throw the Thackerays out of Mumbai.
37. Rajinikanth kills two stones with one bird.
 
38. Google won't find Rajinikanth because you don't find Rajinikanth; Rajinikanth finds you.
39. Rajinikanth gave the Joker those scars.
40. Rajinikanth leaves messages before the beep.
41. 
Rajinikanth once warned a young girl to be good "or else". The result? Mother Teresa.
42. Rajinikant electrocuted Iron Man.
43. Rajinikanth killed Spiderman using Baygon Anti Bug Spray.
44. Rajinikanth can make PCs better than the Mac.
45. Rajinikanth puts the 'laughter' in manslaughter.
46. Rajinikanth goes to court and sentences the judge.
47. Rajinikanth can handle the truth.
48. Rajinikanth can speak Braille.
49. Rajinikanth can dodge Chuck Norris' roundhouse kicks.
50. Rajinikanth can teach an old dog new tricks.
51. Rajinikanth calls Voldemort by his name.
52. Who do you think taught Voldemort Parseltongue? Rajinikanth did.
53. Chuck Norris once met Rajinikanth. The result - He was reduced to a joke on the internet.
54. Rajinikanth got small pox when he was a kid. As a result small pox is now eradicated.
55. Rajinikanth’s calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajanikanth.
56. Rajinikanth grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
57. The last time Rajinikanth killed someone, he slapped himself to do it. The other guy just disintegrated. Resonance.
58. Rajinikanth once had a heart attack. His heart lost.
59. Rajinikant is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
60. Rajinikanth can run at speed of light around a tree and screw himself.
61.Rajinikant can lick his elbows.
62. Rajinikant once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.
63. Rajinikant does not get frostbite. Rajnikant bites frost.
64. Rajinikant doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
65. 
Rajinikant got his drivers license at the age of 16 seconds.
66. When you say “no one is perfect”, Rajinikant takes this as a personal insult.
67. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajinikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself.
68. Words like awesomeness, brilliance, legendary etc. were added to the dictionary in the year 1949. That was the year Rajinikanth was born.
69. The statement "nobody can cheat death", is a personal insult to Rajnikanth. Rajni cheats and fools death everyday.
70. When Rajnikanth is asked to kill some one he doesn't know, he shoots the bullet and directs it the day he finds out.
71. Rajinikant can give pain to Painkillers and headache to Anacin.
72. 
Rajinikanth knows what women really want.
73. Time and tide wait for Rajinikanth.
74. Rajinikanth sneezed only once in his entire life, that's when the tsunami occurred in the Indian ocean.
75. As a child when Rajinikanth had dyslexia, he simply re-scripted the alphabet.
76. Rajinikanth collects Honey from his private Moon - HoneyMoon.
77. 
Rajinikanth can answer a missed call.
78. 
Rajinikanth doesn't need a visa to travel abroad, he just jumps from the tallest building in Chennai and holds himself in the air while the earth rotates.
79. Rajinikanth's brain works faster than Chacha Chaudhury's.
80. Rajinikanth doesn't shower. He only takes blood baths.
81. To be or not to be? That is the question. The answer? Rajinikanth.
82. The quickest way to a man's heart is with Rajinikanth's fist.
83. Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Rajinikanth, there is no other way.
84. Rajinikanth's every step creates a mini whirlwind. Hurricane Katrina was the result of a morning jog.
85. Rajinikant doesn’t bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint out of fear.
86. Archaeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined “victim” as “one who has encountered Rajinikant”.
87. There is no such thing as global warming. Rajinikanth was feeling cold, so brought the sun closer to heat the earth up. 88. Once a cobra bit Rajinikanth' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
89. Rajinikanth is a champion in the game "Hide n' seek", as no one can hide from Rajinikanth.
90. Rajinikant proves Newton wrong all the time. Every time he performs an action, he simply eliminates anything and everything that can provide the reaction.
91. Rajinikant is a weapon created by God to use on doomsday to end the world.
92. Aliens do indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Rajinikanth is on.
93. We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Rajinikanth.
94. If at first you don't succeed, you're not Rajinikanth.
 95. Rajinikanth's first job was as a bus conductor. There were no survivors.
96. Rajinikanth does not style his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.
97. When Rajinikanth plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy.
98. Rajinikanth is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
99. Rajinikanth's house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.
100. Rajnikanth doesn’t answer nature’s call nature answers Rajnikanth’s call.
101. Rajnikanth can double click 2 icons at the same time.

Vayalar Rama Varma Awards 2011


Vayalar Rama Varma Awards 2011 announced. Vayalar Chalachithra Ratnam award is given to veteran actor Thilakan and Best Actor Award to Prithviraj for his acting in Urumi and Indian Rupee. M G Radhakrishnan is awarded Ragaratna posthumously. Ganaratna Award is given to Poovachal Khader. Ramya Nambeeshan is the Best Actress considering the films Traffic and Chappakurishu.
Ranjith’s Indian Rupee is the Best Picture in feature film category. Traffic is the second best movie.
Award Jurie include Chairman Dr. M R Thamban (Director of Bhasha Institute), Sohanlal (Director), Ravi Menon, Girija Sethunath, Sulochana Ram Mohan (Film Critic), Jayan Nair (Serial Director).
For the performance in Salt n Pepper, Baburaj is selected for Second Best Actor Award. Ananya is the Second Best Actress (Senoirs).
Best New Commer: Fahad Fasil
Best Cinematographer: Santhosh Sivan (Urumi)
Best Editor: Mahesh Narayan (Traffic)
Best Art Director: Boban (Veeraputhran)
Best Scriptwriter: Shankar Ramakrishnan (Urumi)
Best Musician: Bijipal
Best Lyricist: Rafeek Ahammed
Best Male Singer: Madhu Balakrishnan
Best Female Singer: Manjari
Best New Singers: Ravishankar (Manikyakallu), Pushpalatha (Salt n Pepper)
Best Background Score: Ramesh Narayan
Best Costumer: Sameera Saneesh
Best Make Up man: Pattanam Rasheed
Best Child Artist: Ananthapadmanabhan
Best Cinema Reporter: Kovalam Satheesh Kumar (Kerala Kaumudi).
Vayalar Television Awards:

Best Serial: Ardhachandrante Raathri (Amrutha TV)
Best Actress: Praveena (Chila Nerangalil Chila Manushyar, Devi Mahathmyam), Krishna Nair (Bhadra)
Best Director: Sujith Sunder (Autograph)

Santhosh Pandit's Krishnanum Radhayum , THEATRE RESPONSE !!!

NB: ചീത്ത വിളിക്കേണ്ട ഒന്നാണ് എന്ന മുന്‍വിധിയോടെയല്ലാതെ ഇത് കാണാന്‍ ശ്രമിക്കൂ, നിങ്ങള്‍ ചിരിക്കും. അയാള്‍ സീരിയസ്സായി ചെയ്തത് നമ്മെ ചിരിപ്പിക്കുന്നു. ഇത് തന്നെയാണ് ശ്രീനിവാസനും ചെയ്തിട്ടുള്ളത്. ശ്രീനിവാസനു ശേഷം സന്തോഷ് പണ്ഡിറ്റ് എന്നു പറഞ്ഞാലും തെറ്റില്ല. (berlytharangal.com)




Santhosh Pandit's Interviews






പെഴ!: കൃഷ്ണനും രാധയും-മാറ്റത്തിന്‍റെ ധുംധുഭിനാദം



കൃഷ്ണനും രാധയും ട്രെയ്‍ലര്‍ (റിവ്യൂ)

Tracing the Roots of Malayalam Cinema

Vanity Moments: Tracing the Roots of Malayalam Cinema: W ith the memories of my evening jaunts to a tiny wayside tea stall located in the fringes of the Trivandrum city and the light talks I use...

SEVENES



Sevenes is a 2011 Malayalam sports film written by Ikbal Kuttipuram and directed by Joshiy with Kunchacko BobanAsif Ali, Rejith Menon, Nivin Pauly, Aju Varghese, Rima KallingalBhama and Nadia Moidu in pivotal roles. The film centres around seven young men, passionate about sevens football, a kind of football popular in Malabar. The film started its shooting in April 2011 at Calicut.


directed by Joshiy


SEVENES is a good movie to watch . 

Plot

The film is about seven young men, passionate about football – sevens football to be precise – and how they inadvertently get involved in a crime. Sevens is a kind of football played in North malabar, especially in Kozhikode,Malappuram and Kannur. It is played by seven players on each side, instead of the traditional 11. The name 'Sevenes' ascribed to the movie refers to the gang of seven friends and not as such to sevens football.

പൃഥ്വിയെ രക്ഷിക്കാന്‍ എടുത്തതല്ല ഇന്ത്യന്‍ റുപ്പി: രഞ്ജിത്


PRO
പരാജയങ്ങളിലും അപവാദപ്രചരണങ്ങളിലും പെട്ട് കരിയര്‍ പ്രതിസന്ധിയിലായ ഒരു നടനെ രക്ഷിച്ചെടുക്കാന്‍ വേണ്ടിയല്ല താന്‍ ‘ഇന്ത്യന്‍ റുപ്പി’ എന്ന ചിത്രം എടുത്തതെന്ന് സംവിധായകന്‍ രഞ്ജിത്. പൃഥ്വിരാജിലുള്ള വിശ്വാസമാണ് ‘ജെ പി’ എന്ന കഥാപാത്രത്തെ അദ്ദേഹത്തെ ഏല്‍പ്പിക്കാന്‍ കാരണമായതെന്നും രഞ്ജിത് പറയുന്നു.

ഇന്ത്യാവിഷനിലെ ‘മുഖാമുഖം’ എന്ന അഭിമുഖ പരിപാടിയില്‍ പങ്കെടുത്ത് സംസാരിക്കുകയായിരുന്നു രഞ്ജിത്.

“പൃഥ്വിരാജിന്‍റെ പ്രതിച്ഛായ മെച്ചപ്പെടുത്തുക എന്നത് എന്‍റെ ലക്‍ഷ്യമായിരുന്നില്ല. പൃഥ്വി എന്ന ആക്ടറെ രക്ഷപ്പെടുത്താന്‍ എടുത്ത ചിത്രവുമല്ല ഇന്ത്യന്‍ റുപ്പി. ആ നടനില്‍ എനിക്ക് വിശ്വാസമുണ്ട്. ‘ജെ പി’ എന്ന കഥാപാത്രത്തെ അയാള്‍ക്ക് ചെയ്യാന്‍ കഴിയുമെന്ന് എനിക്ക് ഉറപ്പുണ്ടായിരുന്നു. പിന്നെ, പൃഥ്വിരാജിന് നേരെയുള്ള സൈബര്‍ ആക്രമണമൊന്നും ഇന്ത്യന്‍ റുപ്പിയെ ബാധിച്ചിട്ടില്ല. സിനിമയില്‍ പൃഥ്വിരാജിനെ അദ്യം കാണിക്കുമ്പോള്‍ ചിലരൊക്കെ കൂവുന്നത് ഞാന്‍ ശ്രദ്ധിച്ചു. അങ്ങനെ സംഭവിച്ചേക്കാം എന്ന് ഞാന്‍ പ്രതീക്ഷിക്കുകയും ചെയ്തിരുന്നു. പക്ഷേ പിന്നീട് പ്രേക്ഷകര്‍ നടനെയും സംവിധായകനെയും മറക്കുകയും ജെ പി എന്ന കഥാപാത്രത്തെയും ആ കഥയെയും അനുഭവിക്കുകയുമായിരുന്നു.” - രഞ്ജിത് വ്യക്തമാക്കുന്നു.

ഇന്ത്യന്‍ റുപ്പിക്കായി പൃഥ്വിരാജിന്‍റെ ശരീരഭാഷയെ ജെ പി എന്ന കഥാപാത്രത്തിനനുസരിച്ച് മാറ്റിയിരുന്നതായും രഞ്ജിത് പറയുന്നു.
SOURCE :http://malayalam.webdunia.com/entertainment/film/interview/1110/15/1111015051_1.htm#.Tpmu1DSVd7k.facebook


INDIAN RUPEE, ഇന്ത്യന്‍ റൂപ്പീ (MOVIE)

Indian Rupee produced under the banner of August Cinema is a 2011 Malayalam satirical film directed by Ranjith , after his super hit PRANCHIYETTAN and THE SAINT . The film stars PrithvirajThilakan andRima Kallingal in the lead roles. [1] The film released on 6th October 2011.


JUST WATCHED "INDIAN RUPEE " . Its really a TREAT for Good Movie lovers by RENJITH  . I loved it. THILAKAN and JAGATHY had awesome performances. Its really a MUST SEE MOVIE .

പൃഥ്വിയെ രക്ഷിക്കാന്‍ എടുത്തതല്ല ഇന്ത്യന്‍ റുപ്പി: രഞ്ജിത്


Indian Rupee Movie Song Ee Puzhayum Sandyakalum ...

BERLY's 

ഇന്ത്യന്‍ റൂപ്പീ (റിവ്യൂ)

Renjith during the making of "Indian Rupee"

RAJNIKANTH JOKES -

When Rajnikant was studying in 3rd std....some1 stole his rough note....&

Now they call it as .............Wikipedia

Crazy people!!!! ;)

========================================

When Rajnikant was a Student¦!!!

Teachers use to Bunk the classes!!!

========================================

Rajnikant started college. All students were confused while taking admission because name of college is

"Rajnikant's Medical College of Engineering for Commerce".

========================================

THE MOST NEGLECTED FACT OF THE ENTIRE DECADE!!!!


Sachin Tendulkar's mothers name is RAJNI Tendulkar

And his coach's name is ramaKANT

Is there a need to say anything beyond this???

========================================

Rajinikant got 150 questions in exam paper asking - "Solve any 100 questions"

He solved all 150 and wrote, " Rascalla!, CHECK ANY 100!"

========================================

One day Rajani thought to play cricket in monsoon and rain stopped due to play.

========================================

Rajnikanth's next project is the Titanic in Tamil. However, Rajni has twisted the climax. Both the lead actors survive. Rajni swims

across the Atlantic Ocean with the heroine in one hand and... The Titanic in the other

========================================

"Who says the world will be destroyed in Dec 2012..Rajnikant just bought a Laptop with three years warranty"

========================================

Rajni can walk faster than light.
"Rajni cannot be created or destroyed; it can only be changed from one form to another".

========================================

Law of Conservation of Rajni

All scientists failed to answer this but rajnikanth did...
Ques: Which liquid turns solid on heating?
Ans: Dosa... mind it!!!

========================================

Once a photo of Rajnikant was given for Xerox. Don't even try to guess what happened.

We got two copies of the Xerox machine.

========================================

One more:

Once upon a time

Rajnikant used Tooth Powder to get strong teeth

today that powder is known as

"AMBUJA CEMENT"

========================================

ചില മലയാള ചിത്രങ്ങളും അവയുടെ ORIGINAL FILMS um.


MALAYALAM COPY CAT FILMS 

1 ചന്ദ്രലേഖ (1997)- You were sleeping(1995)
2 ബൂയിംഗ് ബൂയിംഗ് (1985)- Boeing Boeing(1965)
3 വെട്ടം (2004)- French Kiss(1995)
4 താളവട്ടം (1986)-One flew over the cockoo’s nest(1975)
5 കാക്കക്കുയില്‍ (2001)- A fish called wanda(1988)
6 വെള്ളാനകളുടെ നാട് (1988)- Yours; Mine and Ours(1968)
7 ഉദയനാണ് താരം(2005)-Bowfinger(1999)
8 ബിഗ്‌ ബി (2007) Four Brothers (2005)
9 ഗോലുമാല്‍ (2009) Nine Queens (2000)
10 ഹെലോ മൈ ഡിയര്‍ റോങ്ങ്‌ നമ്പര്‍ (1986)-North by northwest(1959)
11 മാളൂട്ടി (1992)-Everybody’s baby: The rescue of Jessica Mc Clare(1989)
12 ഒരു മറവത്തൂര്‍ കനവ് (1998)- Jean De Florette(1986)
13 തൂവല്‍ സ്പര്‍ശം (1990)- 3 Men and a Baby(1987)
14 ആകാശദൂത് (1993)- Who will love my children(1983)
15 യോദ്ധാ (1992)-The Golden Child(1986) + Blind Fury(1989)
16 ഒളിമ്പ്യന്‍ അന്തോണി ആദം (1999)- Kindergarten Cop(1990)
17 അങ്കിള്‍ ബണ്‍ ( 1991)- Uncle Buck(1989)
18 രാംജി റാവു സ്പീക്കിംഗ് (1989)- See the man run(1971)
19 മാന്നാര്‍ മത്തായി സ്പീക്കിംഗ് (1995)- Vertigo(1958)
20 ആയുഷ്കാലം (1992)- Ghost(1990)
21 പ്രാഞ്ചിയേട്ടന്‍ (2010)- The World of Don Camillo(1984)
22 പട്ടാളം ( 2003)- Captain Corelli’s Mandolin(2001)
23 ജോണിവാക്കര്‍ (1992)- Back to School(1986)
24 കിലുക്കം (1991)- Roman Holiday(1953)
25 വന്ദനം( 1989)- Stake Out(1987)
26 എന്റെ മാമാട്ടിക്കുട്ടിയമ്മക്ക് (1983)- Annie(1982)
27 ഹലോ (2007)- Cellular(2004)
28 കാഴ്ച (2004)- Bashu, the little stranger(1990)
29 േഘമല്‍ഹാര്‍ (2001)- Brie Encounter(1945)
30 അന്‍വര്‍ (2010)- Traitor(2003)
31 നോട്ട്ബുക്ക്‌ ( 2006)- Susan slade(1961) and , Juno
32 ആനവാല്‍ മോതിരം (1990)- Short Time(1990)
33 അദ്ദേഹം എന്ന ഇദ്ദേഹം (1993)- Three Fugitives(1989)
34 മയൂഖം (2005)- A Walk to Remember(2002)
35 ലൈഫ് ഈസ്‌ ബ്യൂട്ടിഫുള്‍ (2000)- Dead Poets Society(1989)
36 മഞ്ഞുപോലൊരു പെണ്‍കുട്ടി 2004)-Crime and punishment in Suburbia(2000)
37 ഭാര്‍ഗവചരിതം മൂന്നാം ഗണ്ഡം(2006)-Analyze This(1999)
38 ജെയിംസ് ബോണ്ട് (1999)- Baby’s Day Out(1994)
39 അലക്സാണ്ടര്‍ ദി ഗ്രേറ്റ് (2010)- Rain Man(1988)
40 ചെപ്പ്‌ (1987)- To Sir, With Love(1967)
41 ഹൃദയത്തില്‍ സൂക്ഷിക്കാന്‍ (2005)-Meet the parents(2000)
42 പട്ടാഭിഷേകം (1999)-Larger than life(1996)
43 കൌതുക വാര്‍ത്തകള്‍ (1990)- Worth Winning(1989)
44 എഫ് ഐ ആര്‍ (1999)- The Untouchable(1987)
45 വിസ്മയത്തുമ്പത്ത്‌ (2004)- Just Like Heaven
46 അക്ഷരത്തെറ്റ്‌ (1989)- Fatal Attraction(1987)
47 ആഗസ്റ്റ്‌-1 (1988)- The day of the Jackal(1973)
48 നിന്നിഷ്ടം എന്നിഷ്ടം (1986)- City Of Lights(1931-a Charlie Chaplin Film)
49 ഓടരുതമ്മാവാ ആളറിയാം (1984)- Chashme Buddoor(1981)
50 പപ്പന്‍ പ്രിയപ്പെട്ട പപ്പന്‍ (1986)- Heaven can wait(1978)
51 T.D. ദാസന്‍,STD.VI. B (2010)- Mary and Max(2009)
52 ഫോര്‍ ഫ്രെണ്ട്സ് (2010)- The Bucket List(2007)
53 ജൂനിയര്‍ മാണ്ട്രെക്ക് (1997)- The Big Job(1965)
54 വിറ്റ്‌നസ് (2000)- Dial ‘M’ for murder(1954)
55 നിര്‍ണ്ണയം-The fugitive
56 ചാപ്പ കുരിശ്-Hand phone (korean)
57 മുല്ല- Tsotsi(South African 2005)
58 COCKTAIL - Butterfly on a wheel

Highest Grossing MALAYALAM MOVIEs of 2010


There were 92 movies released in this year. The highest grossing movie is Shafi's Marykkundoru Kunjaadu starring Dileep and Bhavana.

Sl. No:TitleNett grossWorldwide Gross
1Marykkundoru KunjaaduINR 11,40,00,000INR 14,40,00,000[1][2]
2Pokkiri RajaINR 6,50,00,000INR 11,00,00,000[3]
3ShikkarINR 3,75,00,000INR 7,50,00,000[4]
9Pranchiyettan and The SaintINR 2,00,00,000INR 2,50,00,000[10]
4KaaryasthanINR 2,00,00,000INR 4,50,00,000[5]
5In Ghost House InnINR 1,50,00,000INR 4,00,00,000[6]
6Pappy AppachaINR 1,25,00,000INR 3,50,00,000[7]
7Elsamma Enna AankuttyINR 1,25,00,000INR 3,25,00,000[8]
8Happy HusbandsINR 75,00,000INR 3,00,00,000[9]
10Malarvadi Arts ClubINR 25,00,000INR 2,00,00,000[11]
source :http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malayalam_films_of_2010#Highest_Grossing